Independence is not Always About Breaking Free

There is an element of life that we all strive for, from early ages until the end.  It’s a natural drive that pulls us to a standing position as a toddler and generates little legs to take mighty steps.  When we fall on our face, it’s that same energy that makes us oblivious to the fall so we get up and try again.

That fire within fuels the teen, the college age and beyond to discover who they are and what they can do.  As adults we learn to concentrate on skills that can set us apart as experts and at the same time join us to a tribe of like-minded professionals.

This inferno that propels us has also been known to create causes, cut losses and conceive nations.  We call this independence. 

So why is it that we fan those flames of independence our entire lives and seem shocked when an aging loved ones fights back to hold on to theirs? No one wants to give up something they have worked on for decades.  When we see a loved one losing their agility, why not present options that will enhance their sense of independence rather than feel like it’s being stripped away? 

There are options that can help a parent stay in their home and not feel pressured to surrender the years of memories so often attached to that house.  There are remedies to insure safety for those who have physical challenges.

If there is an adult child caring for the parent, the way we suggest solutions may or may not make the parent feel threatened.  But if we offer options indicating this is for us and not them, the heart of the parent will acquiesce.  Why is that? Because they want to help their own child and feel the strength of still being able to provide for another.

Independence is not always about breaking free from something, it can also encompass the emotion of feeling needed, sought after and productive. Who do you know that needs to be reminded of the impact they still have today? Appreciation can reignite those embers and light up a life for years to come!